I never got around to writing the June Edition of the Wrigley Report, so I’m just going to skip over that and get to July:
Game Day: Friday, July 22 @ Alexian Field; Schaumburg Flyers vs. Kansas City Hayseeds (or something). OK, we couldn’t get Cubs tickets for July so we’re settling for the Schaumburg Flyers. If you have a problem with that, then I guess you should have donated some tickets. We’ll be back at Wrigley in August.
Seats: Section L, Row 16, seats 5 & 6. You never get this close at Wrigley, and at $9.50 per person, the tickets here are cheaper than those stupid Ticketmaster surcharges you’d get trying to see the Cubs.
Ceremonial First Pitch/7th Inning Stretch Celebrity: We missed the 1st pitch, but it was probably someone from the chamber commerce or the local boy scout troup. Bearon the Bear was there too. Better than Belushi!
Fashion Report: It was Jimmy Buffet night, so there were plenty of fat ladies in grass skirts and bald men in Hawaiian shirts. The lady in front of us wore a lime green cowboy hat, adorned with a flip-flop printed scarf and some kind of battery-operated clip-on hair extension (?). A guy in front of her was wearing a T-shirt with a pirate on the back, and he had a skull-and-crossbones scarf tied around his head. We couldn’t tell if he had dressed like the pirate on purpose or if he just liked pirates.
Where the drunk people are: At Alexian Field, apparently. There aren’t a lot of bars in the area… Maybe Pilot Pete’s?
Dude factor: The Hawaiian shirts were so loud that I didn’t notice an overabundance of the word “Dude.”
