I have a week and a half left of maternity leave, so of course now is when I would start to feel really comfortable going out and doing things with Mo. We have our schedule more or less in place, with three naps a day, so now if she misses one nap, I don’t feel like everything is going to go to shit. So that gives me a 3-4 hour window in which I feel comfortable going out.
Yesterday I took Mo for her first trip to the big city to go meet Jay for lunch. We visited his office so all his co-workers could meet her and marvel at how adorable and alert she is, and then ate in Millennium Park while the CSO was practicing. Pretty nice! Today we went shopping with my mom and tomorrow we have a playdate. It’s nice to not feel like a shut-in anymore.
I do think I’m ready to go back to work, though. It helps that I think the nanny we found is so amazing, and she’s coming to our house, and she will handle Mo’s schedule exactly how I tell her to. And maybe wash some bottles and do some laundry while she’s here. I probably wouldn’t feel the same if I had to send Mo to a daycare center. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, and we may have to do that at some point… But for now, I am really happy that Mo will be in her familiar house, getting one on one attention.
Not that I don’t love spending time with Mo, but being with her all day, every day has made me a bit neurotic. I obsess over the stupid mundane details, like when is the EXACT right time to put her down for a nap or how much time should I spend directly interacting with her versus letting her play on her own or why did she eat half an ounce less than she normally does? At work, I can control all the little details, but babies are so unpredictable. I think if I can take a step back and let the nanny handle the tedious stuff, I will be able to enjoy Mo even more than I already do.
I do wish I could work from home more than just one day a week, though. It would be nice to be able to step away from work for a few minutes at a time to visit her… Or take her on a walk at lunchtime. It would also be nice to not have to spend 2 hours a day in my car. Oh well… A girl can dream…